What reading does to me!

I have been reading a book from my favorite author Jane Green. It makes me think about how we unknowing sometimes choose our own fate. I could have gotten married and have at least two kids by now....but I deiced to be with my husband. I may not have kids right now but I do have a wonderfully fulfilled life knowing my husband and I are truly in love. How you ask....when he touches me I get chills.....when he kisses everything stops around me.....when he holds me I wanna melt away....when he looks at me I feel like his eyes only ever see me. Well now that I have made myself cry back to the book.

The book is really good I have it almost finished.

So if you get a chance to read any of her books you should they are very witty and cute!

Love Always

Sarah

Me thinking again!

Scary I know.....I just have had soo many thoughts running through my head as of lately. Some things about the past concerning old friends some things about the present job and friends. Part of me thinks I strive too much for perfection with things then I probly should....part of me thinks I slack off too much! I will admit I am not the kinda person to just go with the flow if I want things to go a certain way. I do need to be in some sort of control even if its something little! Maybe its because I am extremely over tired but some days I wonder if I would have turned out any different if I tried a little harder or pushed myself even more. My answer is no I don't believe it would be any different then now. Guess I will never really know.

How come I am so scared of failure?


Am I scared of being forgotten....being unknown......not worthy! Not sure....all I know is sometimes I try to pretend I know what's going on to fool myself into believing I am something great.... just to keep myself going!

Well I should head to bed!

Love Always

Sarah

Weight

I have been dealing with my weight since freshman year in high school. It has hit me since my birthday how much weight I have put on since senior year and it makes me angry on top of sad. Well....I don't wanna hear peoples judgements. I get enough on a daily basis much less from people I know. I know I have not always helped the cause but I wouldn't by no means call myself LAZY. I have been doing yoga and walking but I haven't lost a pound......sad which is why sometimes I just dont care. I know it will always be a struggle till probly the day I die.

Maybe one day I will find something or someone that will actually push me to do what I need to do to loose the weight I am suppose to.......maybe just maybe!

Love Always

Sarah